I gotta let this die

I know how hard you've tried

Tryin' to keep this alive.

But you can't do it anymore

You gotta let it go

So i think it's time

To let this die

-Brian Joo's "Let This Die"

I'll survive. I've been through worst and i got out fine. I can do this.

Nights like these, i just wanna curl up in bed till i eventually fall asleep. Thoughts will run wild, tears will fall, but i'll wake up in the morning feeling stronger than the night before. I've grown a lot over this past 2 years.

I hope and i hope and i hope... That one day everything will work out fine. Give me something to fight for, and to hold onto. Anything. If not, then i gotta let this die.

xoxo, W

History

This is killing me. I won't let history repeat itself and i won't let myself end up in that state again. Ever. It was crazy, i went head in and i ended up broken. I became someone i never wanted to be. This time i'm gonna play it smart. As much as it kills me, i cannot show. Because unless it's reciprocated, it's pointless. And right now i don't know what's going on.

Someone like you would never fall for someone like me. So no, i mustn't get into this.

This time round, i'll leave it to time. Cuz only time will tell...

xoxo, W

you broke me.

and now i'm afraid he will too.

Heartstrings

No i can't fall for you, and i won't fall for you.

It's a new year and when i said i was looking for something new, this came. I never saw it coming and i never knew it'll turn out to be like this. I don't like this helpless free-falling feeling. I can't control my emotions and it's not helping.

I don't wanna feel weak again. I don't wanna be struggling with my own emotions and end up being sad, depressed, dark and twisted all over again. I'm past that stage and i don't intend to go back into it. I wanna be happy, whatever it may be.

-Right now as i'm typing this, i'm waiting for the company to upload Ukiss's new MV. My mind is in a whirl right now and whatever i might be typing after this, might not make sense-

So anw, i need to be stronger than this. I can't give in. Not yet. Until i know it's something solid, i must not fall into this.

With that said, i had a great time with my girls today :) Valentine's day dinner as usual ^^

xoxo, W

Beezeeeee bee

I'm back from my busiest week (i hope) and i have pictures ;) I like posting pictures cuz then i wouldn't have to type so much. Yupppp.

This was from Lesley's 21st party yesterday ^^ She's not in the picture cuz she's busy mingling with the guests so.. we self-entertain. Hahaha!

Oh! And i did my nails for CNY this year cuz Manda wanted to do hers so she asked me along, and well i added ribbons :)

Yep, that's all the pictures i have for now.

Tomorrow marks the day of a new start for me! I'll be starting work at H&M and i'm stoked. It'll be fun, i hope! Goodnight <3

xoxo, W

Happy birthday, my favourite boy ♡

Just because we can't be together, doesn't mean i won't love you.

-Blair.

I could love you forever, if you'd let me. This could be for anyone... No specific person in mind right now. Although if we look at it from a very delusional point of view, then kiseop would be perfect. Just kidding luh...

I don't know if i wanna fall in love again. I mean, i do, but idk if i want it now. Or in the near future. I might want one, but i don't wanna stop liking/loving Kisp. To many, he is just an idol, or some guy who doesn't know i exist. True that, i agree with them, very strongly in fact. But to me he's not just an idol. I don't know how to put it into words but, i guess you could say that i've learned a lot from him and his existence is a gift from heaven. No kidding. If he lost his life back then, things wouldn't be the same at all.

Right, i'm digressing again. Back to the point, to me, kisp is more than just an idol. I really do love him, as a person. Not totally as a boyfriend kind of love, but as a person, a friend? Ah well you get what i mean.

And i really wanna find someone like kisp. I hope he exists, somewhere.

Someone that can make me as happy as kisp does, even though he doesn't know me and even though we're not together physically. Or even mentally, for this case -.- C'mon, he has thousands of fans out there as well, and i'm sure they all feel the same way i do.

It's like magic, how 1 heart can be beating for thousands of hearts.

Lee Kiseop, before the clock strikes 12, happy birthday once again <3 내 사랑하는 이기섭오빠 생일축하해용 ^^ 전 영원히 너옆에있어... 이렇게 응원할거에요 ^^ 항상건강하고 행복하세요. 우리 키스미와 유키스멤버들 함께해용~ 끝까지. 유키스만 아무것도 필요없어 ♡♡♡

사랑하자.

xoxo, W