왜 이렇게 힘든지?

아파서 이제... 내 마음 또 많이 아프네요. 왜...

I wish i could read minds, i wish i could understand things beyond just the surface level but try as i may, i end up failing. Life has a funny way of playing with you doesn't it? It throws you something good, then turns it in your worst nightmare, and once that's over and you think you're out of the woods, life hands you something even better. At that moment you'd feel like life is finally giving you your rainbow after the storm, but sure, enjoy it while it lasts cause it's won't be long now, before life takes it right off your hands.

It's funny right, how you think you can pull through even the crappiest heart aches, but then you find yourself right at square one all over again. It's like you never got anywhere, it's like nothing has changed but yet everything has changed. But here you are, just wondering when this endless storm is gonna end.

And so i wonder, why are you a closed book, it's like i can't even try to know you. 2 years ago it was like that, now it's still the same. You've been amazing but prolly our timing is wrong, again. I thought this is the "if our time comes again" but i guess it was all in my head. My own wishful thinking.

I don't know. I really don't know anymore. And it feels like i will never know because how can i do it if i'm the only one clapping? 포기 했어 안 했어? 나도 진짜 몰라.

xoxo, W