I will come back to blogging soon.. I hope.

xoxo, W

I'm alive

My heart finally feels alive again after 2 years. Cuz i'm breaking the walls i've built in the past :) I'm ready to love again. I miss having someone by my side, through the ups and the downs. Someone i can be dorky with in our own world. I don't need flowers and expensive dinner-dates to be happy. I just need someone who will be there for me, even if it means eating bread and kaya for a month. I'm serious.

I used to think that i've found him, that we can go against all odds together. I thought he'd be there for me even if everyone turns their backs on me. But i was wrong. He left too. Not trying to sound crazy here but it really felt like my whole world just came crashing down on me and i had to pick up the pieces all by myself. Which i did..

THAT ASIDE... hahaha, i'm fine now. I know it took me a long time to be fine but i'm fine now. That's all that matters right?! :)

The right one will come along and make everything better. I'll wait for you, whoever you may be.

xoxo, W

I gotta let this die

I know how hard you've tried

Tryin' to keep this alive.

But you can't do it anymore

You gotta let it go

So i think it's time

To let this die

-Brian Joo's "Let This Die"

I'll survive. I've been through worst and i got out fine. I can do this.

Nights like these, i just wanna curl up in bed till i eventually fall asleep. Thoughts will run wild, tears will fall, but i'll wake up in the morning feeling stronger than the night before. I've grown a lot over this past 2 years.

I hope and i hope and i hope... That one day everything will work out fine. Give me something to fight for, and to hold onto. Anything. If not, then i gotta let this die.

xoxo, W

History

This is killing me. I won't let history repeat itself and i won't let myself end up in that state again. Ever. It was crazy, i went head in and i ended up broken. I became someone i never wanted to be. This time i'm gonna play it smart. As much as it kills me, i cannot show. Because unless it's reciprocated, it's pointless. And right now i don't know what's going on.

Someone like you would never fall for someone like me. So no, i mustn't get into this.

This time round, i'll leave it to time. Cuz only time will tell...

xoxo, W

you broke me.

and now i'm afraid he will too.

Heartstrings

No i can't fall for you, and i won't fall for you.

It's a new year and when i said i was looking for something new, this came. I never saw it coming and i never knew it'll turn out to be like this. I don't like this helpless free-falling feeling. I can't control my emotions and it's not helping.

I don't wanna feel weak again. I don't wanna be struggling with my own emotions and end up being sad, depressed, dark and twisted all over again. I'm past that stage and i don't intend to go back into it. I wanna be happy, whatever it may be.

-Right now as i'm typing this, i'm waiting for the company to upload Ukiss's new MV. My mind is in a whirl right now and whatever i might be typing after this, might not make sense-

So anw, i need to be stronger than this. I can't give in. Not yet. Until i know it's something solid, i must not fall into this.

With that said, i had a great time with my girls today :) Valentine's day dinner as usual ^^

xoxo, W