365 days

It's been a year. A year since things changed and kept changing thereafter. And it's scary how fast time flies and how much has changed. Feels like the whole world is keeping up with the changes except me. Don't know how i actually pulled through, but i'm glad i did. I mean, i know i'm not totally over everything, but at least there's improvement.

For the past year i've lived as though a huge part of me was missing, and spent the year yearning for someone i know would probably never return. Every day becomes a routine, every night turns into a reminder of how empty my life is, and every memory puts me through series of hell. Yet there wasn't anything i could do. Basically, it was hell.

So i thought the only thing i could do was to pick myself up, to pick up the pieces and whatnot. I spent months trying to fix things, trying to find something to ease the pain but each time i try, i end up hurt. And i'm back where i started. It's pretty much like a vicious cycle, don't you think? >:/

So i've heard things like "The pain will eventually subside" and "Time will heal all wounds". Yes, true... somehow. But the thing is, yes the pain will eventually subside, but the scar's never gonna fade. Because scars are called scars for a reason. Scars remain. And yes time will heal, but the thing is, time takes time. So i guess that means i'm gonna have to take more than a year to fully move on? Is that it?

Whatever it is, i just hope things will get better. I don't know how many times i've told myself that things will get better, but up till now nothing's changed. I'm starting to doubt that phrase. Damn it?

Ohwell, enough of all these emo shiz. I'm gonna go do my UR assignment now, spam a little bit more tumblr photos, and then finish up my show if time permits (:


P.S: Btw, how has your one year been?

xoxo,W